In the War on Terror launched by President George W. Bush, we were introduced to the color code terror alert system from Tom Ridge, the first head of the Department of Homeland Security. Some people made fun of it. Others said it was unnecessarily provocative, even counter-productive. Since then, although the color codes are still being employed, but with a soft-peddle, we have now made a big leap forward. We are now armed with Michael Chertoff’s gut.
On Tuesday, July 10th, 2007, President Bush’s Homeland Security Secretary told the editorial board of The Chicago Tribune www.chicagotribune.com he had a “gut feeling” that the nation should brace for a possible terrorist event. He added: “summertime seems to be appealing to them,” meaning terrorists in Europe. Do you think his gut feeling and the break up of a doctor terror cell in Britain could in any way be related?
I guess the phrase “intestinal fortitude” has taken on a new meaning in this administration. We didn’t realize that when the allusion was made about intensive anti-terror efforts underway in the bowels of the Department of Homeland Security, they were talking about Chertoff’s.
We know of the tradition in the US Military about “gut checks.” It means a soldier should put fear aside, suck it up, and be brave. When Chertoff checks his gut, it implies the opposite, that we should put reason aside and be afraid. In his first inaugural address, which was delivered during the depths of The Depression, FDR counseled Americans that “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” (Roosevelt borrowed the phrase from Henry David Thoreau-1851, who borrowed it from the Duke of Wellington-1831, who borrowed it from Francis Bacon-1623, who borrowed it from Michel de Montaigne-1580 who, it is supposed, reprocessed the phrase from where it was originally found, in Proverbs in the Bible. So much for originality, but then that’s another story.)
The point is that with DHS, it appears we have nothing to fear but Michael Chertoff’s gut feeling. We are anxiously awaiting his next one, which I’m told will come shortly after dinner tonight. Which brings up interesting food for thought. Perhaps his “gut feeling” came after he consumed some tainted Chinese snap beans or something.
Anyway, let’s get this straight. There are some 180,000 people in the Department of Homeland Security working night and day in the "War on Terror." We’ve spent zillions on spy satellites that can read license plates on your car and tattoos on your butt from space. We’ve spent billions beefing up airport security with an army of personnel, high tech nuclear scanning devices and low-tech explosive-sniffing dogs. We have CIA ops all over the world. We have the Patriot Act snooping into everyone’s business. We have Guantanamo, abu Ghraib, renditions, torture and God knows what else being employed in the non-discriminating search for intelligence. And yet, regardless of all that effort, legal or not, it all comes down to Michael Chertoff’s gut?
One thing I am certain of. The Secretary’s gut was certainly not talking to him when Katrina hit in August, 2005. (Where’s Nancy Reagan’s astrologer when we need her?)
Here’s hoping that Chertoff’s “gut feeling” was just a little gas. If it was, I guess it means that he is simply full of effluvia on this one and really has no clue.
There now…don’t you feel more secure?